Fudgecracker Friday

Last night I fell into a deep slumber. Then thinking of all the things I needed to do before work I jumped up, grabbed my clothes and ran to the bathroom. I completely forgot my body was in this fragile state. COMPLETELY had a normal moment (mentally). While in the shower brushing my teeth my body reminded me that it is not my normal body. It was like an electric shock of pain that ran through my body and fired up all of my nerve endings. My skin hurts so bad. The skin on: the bottom of my feet, the top of my thighs, my neck, my stomach, my chest and up under my bra area, my arms, my hands and my face!

I managed to make it to walmart and to work! I called my doctor to get help with my pain. He offered my Tylenol 3 which I’m allergic to after that the nurse put my doctor on the phone. Due to my allergies and my pain level there is nothing more he can do to manage my pain. He wants to refer me to a pain clinic. He spoke about one that got in trouble for prescribing strong medication! Ummmmm what? No! We have a local Conrad Murray? I will not be another Michael J. No thank you!!! The only thing I can do today is go to the ER and hope they give me morphine or demerol. I can’t ask for them because they will think I’m a druggie. I’m not I’m just allergic to all the other stuff they can give means I have a high pain tolerance level. Not to mention I don’t have time to go until tomorrow.

So what now?? Do I go to a pain dr? Go to the ER? I don’t have insurance and that’s a $300 bill if not more. Right now I think I will have to just bare through it. Change my diet and be strict on it. It’s just not worth it anymore. I am over it. I am over the pain. I am over not being myself! This is not the new normal! I refuse to believe it! No!!! Prayer and changing my diet. This has got to work. My quality of life depends on it!

Fudgecracker: a nicer way to say F it! 🤭


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